Honda can go F*ck themselves...

This post is being written with a head full of mucus, stiff body and on a stinkingly hot day.

To make a f*cking long story very short, I was in a bumper bashing some 6 weeks ago...after a huge annoyance with the panel beaters know as "Grand Panel Beaters" who did less than a shitty job putting my car back together (*FYI* My car was not aesthetically complete until I found out the true source of the electrical problems.).  I took the car thinking everything was (relatively) hunky-doory, there was a front towing cap missing and some lines weren't right, but I needed it ok...the next morning I turn on the car and my ABS light and VSA (Stability Control) light comes on in the car.  So I think to myself, this is definitely an electrical or "Honda Orientated" issue...so like any other dumbass, I take it on down to the dealership/service center where I originally bought the car...to explain what happened in dialogue orientated D!ck terms...

"Oh don't worry sir, simple problem to fix, the battery is probably run down from when the panel beaters fixed your car!" Says greasy person.

"Yah, that makes perfect sense, so what's the plan...?" I ask unbeknown of the bullsh!t that will ensue.

"We'll just reset the computer and everything will be fine" Said the grease monkey.

"Rocking!" I reply. (Dumbass)

So, everything seems fine and the brakes are perfect and off I go.

The next morning I wake up, turn on the car and *BANG* the f*cking same lights come on again - unf*ckingbelievable - so there I go, back to Honda and inquire once again about what the issue is.

What came from the second encounter with The Service King and Troupe at this sorry excuse for a dealership was that my battery must have dead cells in it or some sh!t...that's great...they then proceeded to want to charge me for a battery - R1200.00 - are you f*cked in the head???  I drive off searching frantically for a Battery Center, have another one installed and everything is back to being hunky-f*cking-doory...until the next morning...yes...you guess it...

I wake up, and the f*cking-b*tch-c*nt-lights come back on...you can imagine my utter rage...and I don't feel rage often, apart from right now...but yes, rage...so, back to The Cesspit known as Honda I go to complain yet again...hey...at least I got a new battery...wait...f*ck...that doesn't sound right...

So, I am eventually handed over to "The Service Manager" of the center, he rigs my car up to some ancient computer that tells him...not me...him, that my car's ABS Sensor and Pump have stopped working and could be damaged..."Oh, you think?"....

"That's great" I say, "What do you want me to do about it...?"

The Service King answers with, "It's not yours or my problem sir, it was the panel beaters prerogative to change this part as it was most likely damaged in the accident".

"Awesome" I say wanting to simultaneously jam his head in his own ass and make him take 10 deep breaths...(Burn)

I inevitably cannot handle the bullsh!t any more and ask Honda to deliver the car back to the panel beaters (Double Burn) thinking that I'm going to score here, they'll fix the last aesthetic issues I have with the car and they'll replace the ABS pump...(BURN!!!)

...a week later...yes, a week later I pick up the car...lines look great, the colour matches, new light, car cleaned as new...looked great, start it up...no issues...*Thank Christ* I think to myself (And I'm an Atheist...imagine!)  So happy I could have f*cked it...the car I mean...

Next morning...7:15AM...the lights......................f*cking came on...again...the rage...ensues...

After spending a day on the phone between both Honda and Grand Panel Beaters, it was settled that there was a miss communication between the two of them and the part that was supposed to be changed...the f*cking ABS Pump...was not ordered or changed by the panel beaters as they weren't told by Honda...I scream..."Awesome" at the top of my lungs...

What was the final consensus was that the car would be sent back to Honda and they would change the part and the Panels Beaters will sort out the payment between them and Honda for the part...I think to myself, "This is great, the two of them can fight this out and I'll pick up my *biatch* when the smoke clears!" ------> Double Dumbass!!!

So the elusive ABS Pump is now nowhere in sight...literally, not a single dealership or parts warehouse has one in South Africa (Hard to believe it...well f*cking believe it sister...f*ck!)

I have been informed by The Service King that it will take 15 (working) days for the part to arrive from Japan or where ever the hell these parts come from...so, I submit...I can no longer fight...I am a beaten man and my car, like a castrated kitten, sits hopeless at that Cesspit of a Service Station...

Now the fun begins...it has been a week and I have been conveniently placed on the "courtesy car list" - oh, is that a list for all the f*cking morons you like to fob off because you can't handle them making kak for you all blady day??? Huh huhuhuhuhuh...! (BURN!!!)

Today, I have been down their throats about it and still nothing...even though my car has a motor plan, is still on warranty and is currently stored at the exact dealership I bought it from...

I.  Am.  Now.  Ready.  To.  Kill. -------> (BURN!!!)

Being quiet, maybe too quiet...

So my dear readers, or non-existent readers...

I have been somewhat quiet over the last couple of months, but this in no way implies that I have stopped writing, because I have and have been very diligent about what subjects I have approached. In the last couple of months I have been writing article for my digital magazine and it seems to be getting great reviews.

The articles have ranged from everything eco-orientated to social media and back again, so yes, I am trying my hand at some social commentary when it comes to industries such as fashion, which unfortunately I have no education about expect for my own sense of style which is probably still firmly planted in the late 90's - so sue me!

I was given some brilliant advise by one of my very good friends and social media "go-to-guy" Nic Haralambous who, I can assure you, has a much better resolve and education on the "blogosphere" in South Africa as well as social media trends...he advised me to not update my blog as often as I have been writing but to save my blogs, pre-schedule them as posts and have them bomb off, so-to-speak, randomly throughout the next couple of months. Unfortunately, i have not post anything in between my last post and this cry for a pardon (regardless of the amount, or lack of followers on my blog), owning a blog is a responsibility and I have not kept my side of the deal...and I apologise, through my teeth I must highlight.

Another reason "Nic The Guru" told me to hold back on the posting is that he explained to me that the quicker I switch to my own domain and a Wordpress theme, the more "legitimate" and "blogosphere accepted" my blog will be - what ever the hell that means, in essence, I get it and there is definite merit to it all. Hopefully I will be able to transfer most of the simple little touches I have added to this blog at the moment, such as my "Twitter Feed" and "Twit Pic's" which I thought I was being extremely clever in managing to do - (pats himself on the back!)

To end, I will do my best to keep writing updates posts to relieve the cobwebs that seem to be making themselves at home on my blog.

"Bang-----------and the dirt is gone!"